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Hash House Harriers
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Write up for Run No 1444 from the Grove Inn Hares were the GM and Hash Cash Candy and Jake. This was a Burns Night – Australia Day post APGU !! run. The Pack were assembled in the Grove on a chilly January night and after the Hares had given their directions to the two new boots Pete and Robert and bored the rest of us with the tale of the trail the ON ON was called and the Pack was off and running with Rambo Pansy and Jack Tar leading the way – by the way it was the Wrong way as usual, Phsyco and Mojo were off into town and missed the sneaky left turn down under the newly refurbished dark arches where Shaggy was creaming over new premises for the OSSETT BREWERY to ply their wares from – future beerstop was noted. ON ON through the dark arches and to the check Rambo – Robert and Grope guessd wrong yet again and did a circle before coming back to the check and finding an arrow going in the opposite direction. After a quick sprint we managed to catch the pack – at this point Mojo was missing – allegedly he had found a woman of the night and had asked for directions SHE immediately took him “in hand” and we never saw him on the trail again – Mojo’s excuse was he ran to the gyratory and back – yeah a likely story! On On through beeston’s red light area and one or two male hashers were tempted to go for the warmth of the ladies of the night but bravely stuck to the task in hand. The check proved yet another mystery direction but eventually Mezza called the on on and of up Domestic Street we went with the two new boots to the fore and leading the pack – local knowledge also came in handy and the big loop was completed – sadly we could not pay homage to Billy at his statue as we were called back to the check and went off in the opposite direction through the scene of the reason for me joining the Army (the battle of Holbeck Moor pre M621 with the Man city hooligans where I was arrested and banged in front of the beak where I said I was going to change my life and join the Army – the effing judge then layed down the gauntlet and asked to see a report from my commanding officer in six months time – I joined on the Monday and the rest is history 27 years later I left) on on to the under motorway TRAMPS beerstop layed on by Smutters – god that lady runs fast ………….just like AGPU she was one step in front of the pack – must ask how she does it. Nice warming drink and mini refreshments a history lesson from Weasel on the lighting system a rendition of “marching on together” And then the on inn was called and Rambo, Peter, Robert, Magnum and Jack Tar led the way through the darkened fields past the sports centre to the footbridges over the motorway intersection – Jack Tar stopping to see his dream cars in the Audi garage, that was until the price tags came into view. It was then cross the roads and on inn to the warmth of the Grove ready for the down downs raffle and Burns night supper again laid on by Smutters consisting of Neeps – tatties and haggis!!. Down downs went to The Hares - for err well haring. New Boots – Peter and Robert who was subsequently named as well as BIG CHOPPER so now Blow Job has a big Chopper…………make of that what you will!! Cheesy Grin – the man is just a PIMP and I hope that THE JUDGE gives him a long hard sentence. Phsyco & Rambo for the shaggiest run in 2009 – and boy was it!

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